Tuesday, September 11, 2007

What in the...!

What in the world! Imagine my utter horror and disbelief to find this in my work mailbox today:


(Click on it to enlarge it in case you can't read it.)

I knew I was getting older, after all, I've stopped hiding peas under my plate and don't compulsively text message all my friends as much as I used to. But the frickin' AARP!?! And to add insult to injury, specifically points out that I'm "fully eligible!" What the hell does THAT mean? I guess 36 is the new 50. I wonder if buying that Polydent to attach shark teeth to my car tagged me in their database. It was either that or buying the "Lawrence Welk Plays the Greatest Hits of Britney Spears" off the iTunes music store.

...hold the presses! It was the CRUISE! Argg! I KNEW we should have gone on one of those slutty Carribean cruises! That would have added me to the Promiscuous Living Maxim mailing list. Then I could have gotten condom coupons in the mail instead of ones for Depends.

3 comments:

Tracy said...

Yep, I started getting those when I subscribed to a knitting or crochet magazine. I guess only old people work with yarn, and go on cruises.

Anonymous said...

You might as well sign up, you will fit that profile sooner than you realize and you might as well get the 10% off movie tickets the senior specials at restaurants, and the list goes on & on.

Anonymous said...

Hey, you might - if your paranoid - blur out your zip code... it has it down to the streets with the extension, you can even pull it up on Map-quest:

http://www.mapquest.com/maps/map.adp?country=US&zipcode=97232-2175&submit.x=0&submit.y=0