Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Crippling laminating injury

Yesterday I incurred a workplace injury that I would be humiliated to ever report to the Workman's Comp system. Why couldn't I have a COOL workplace injury, like a particularly deep paper cut or a horrible keyboarding accident. Nope, none of those--I suffered a LAMINATING injury! I was laminating some signs and one of them got stuck in the machine. The only way to get it out of the machine was to push the sign, forcing it through and hope that it catches. Well, I made the mistake of pushing the stupid sign perpendicular to my body, twisting myself as I pushed. This resulted in an unstuck lamination job and a crippling back throw-out. I hobbled around the office after that and it's still giving me grief. Great... just in time for having to help set up a dozen tepees! Thank goodness for Vicodin! It will serve to make me not care about not being able to help all the volunteers.

Speaking of which, I was really prone to throwing my back out when Margaret and I first got married. (I know what you're thinking--don't say a word... plus I've had physical therapy which is why my back doesn't usually go out now, not because... uh, anyway, moving on...). I had a standing prescription for muscle relaxants and I would take them at the drop of a hat. Sometimes I would take them just to sleep, rather than any back problems. (Hey, my back COULD have gone out in my sleep!) Well Margaret eventually took them away from me! Can you believe it?!? I was the target of an intervention!!! Fortunately she only took my muscle relaxants away and never did find my stash of heroin. Knowing her, she'd have taken THAT away from me, too! Althought I'm totally fleeing the country if she tries to stage a caffeine intervention!

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