I swear, sometimes homeownership is so not worth it. Last night I went to unload the dishwasher and noticed that there was still water in the bottom of it. When I took a look at the dishes, they were all still covered with specks of who-knows-what. THAT made me a queasy, since I had just eaten dinner with a plate, spoon, and glass from the dishwasher. That funny taste in the food was evidently soap and not Margaret trying to poison me now that my life insurance policy is active. Anyway, being a modern urban dweller more adept at fixing crème brûlée than anything MECHANIZED, the limits of my troubleshooting was 1) turn the dial to rinse in the hopes that time miraculously fixed the problem--nothing; and 2) take off the bottom cover of the dishwasher and look under it--I did that and came to the conclusion that I wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the underside of a dishwasher and the inner workings of a Dodge Magnum--you know, the kind with a Hemi. (Speaking of which, what in the world IS a hemi? Is it what gave Knight Rider turbo boost or the ability to talk? I'm so confused!) Anyway, since I had no idea what I was looking at let alone any inkling of how to fix it, I just screwed the plate back on and tried the rinse cycle again. And imagine this--unscrewing and then reattaching the base plate didn't fix the problem! Now we have to make the decision to fix a low-end dishwasher or just replace it with something else. My dread is the repair for the $200 dishwasher will be $200. Decisions, decisions. Before we bought our own house, we used our money to go play at the coast, get kelp wraps at a day spa, or buy ivory backscratchers. Now we have to think about broken appliances, roof replacements, and property taxes. Oy! What I wouldn't give for a kelp wrap and past life massage.

This morning, to add insult to injury, I had to SIPHON the water out of the dishwasher, since we're going out of town for the weekend and coming back to the rancid aroma of spoiling dishwater wouldn't be our preferred method of being wished "welcome home." I'll just end with saying I have yet to learn how to siphon without getting a mouthful of whatever I'm trying to suck out. I'm just glad it wasn't full of Mountain Dew--I HATE that stuff.